| what if |
[Friday
August 1st, 2008 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 chipper |
] |
what if every thing that people say was the other way around like if you said that you did not like some one and you did. so what if the earth was the only place that did not have water how would you take a shower? that is the only thing that i should say. i am the one who always thinks of the what ifs. so what if the real reason i am so unhappy is because i alway have to lie about that way i feel about people. that is the reason i need to find away out of a lot of things well that is all i have to say for this moment in time. so i have to go now tyalk to you later my dear.
|
|
| the way i see it |
[Friday
August 1st, 2008 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blank |
] |
the only thing i can't under stand is why everything doesn't make since. see at work there are thing that seem to work out the way they should than there are thing that make me say what the hell did i get my self in to. so guess what i just sit back and take the ride. so in the end every thing is what it should be if you look at another way. so whaen i sit and look at it i just can't see any thing but what i want and that is it. me wanting every thing my way is just what i want and that is all i HAVE to SAY. each thing that happens seem okay.
|
|
| the thinks you don't say |
[Friday
July 25th, 2008 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
apathetic |
] |
i don't say much but you would know that by the way i talk. yes it is true i rather not say evry thing that is on my mind. every time i think i am closer to finding out what i want in my life i end up hating what i need to do just to make it though. so when it comes to it i rather be me. so the fact that i really have nothng to hide doesn't mean every thing about me should be out. so why is it that every one wants me to say something so athey have some thing to laugh about.
|
|
| things for work |
[Wednesday
July 16th, 2008 ] |
CHECK LIST
PLEASE CHECK OFF WHAT YOU HAVE DONE...
___ ACCESSORIES/ PJ'S
___ 4-6X GIRLS
___ 7-16
___ NEWBORN
___ INFANT GIRLS
___ TODDLER GIRLS
___ INFANT BOYS
___ TODDLER BOYS
___ 4-7X BOYS
___ 8-20 BOYS TABLES/RACKS
___ FITTING ROOM
___ REGISTER AREAS
___ RETURNS
___ DAMAGES
___ RTV'S
___ MARKUPS/ MARKDOWNS
___ INTERNET SALES
___ ROLLING BARS
___ BOXES
___ SALE CHECK
|
|
| the end of the day.. |
[Saturday
July 12th, 2008 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 loved |
] |
the sky goes dark as the tears
of my pain runs down my face.
the air turns coldas my
love turns intohot hate.
the anger you leave me with
seems to hard to explain.
for i know i still need you
near even if i know i can't
tell a soul.
|
|
| crossroad |
[Saturday
July 12th, 2008 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 flirty |
] |
the path that i walk on in my
life always leads me in the middle.
I am not yet a women, but nor a girl.
i look in the mirror and ask myself
what do i see, the shape of of my
body says iam a women, so as i
stand in the middle of my life at
this cross road of questions,
i realize that my life is just beginning...
|
|
| The end of time |
[Saturday
May 17th, 2008 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 energetic |
] |
I have always been the one who did for others and stood by every one side. So what can i say when i end up loosing who I am . I can say that i was the one who never got notice , which is true i never got notice because i didn't want to be notice. I love being me rather than someone who never got yo smile. My mother say that people say I am stuck up which I don't see. If she could see all the pain and trouble that she has put me though she would se the reason i shut people out my life. I need to just breath. but i can't, every thing around me always goes wrong. I have always said that by the time I got to this point in my life, I would be different. Don't get me wrong I like what I am. I enjoy the friends i Have and think that I have made a change for the best. I don't sit and let people hurt me any more I stand up and speak my mind but i Still don't like being aroung a lot of people at once there is just something that getts me. well that all that i ahve to say for now but i haope that every thing is great where you are and that every one is smiling in your life because i awill never stop smiling....
|
|
|
[Sunday
December 23rd, 2007 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 annoyed |
] |
when I started to writing my peoms i did it so that i could have a chance to say what i wanted rather than being in the shadows of every one around me. That seemed to be easy
as i got older but than something happen I became some one else to everyone else. I was not me I was someones sister or cousin or some ones friend that we met that day.I just want to be able to do something that kept me happy.Now that I am 23 I am still alone in the world. Each time i Think I have a realfriend I end up being a jerk in away that doesn't make any sence know that i am still waiting for the right time to say that i am tired of be what i am not and just run. soin the end i will be happy i guess.
|
|
| What Do You Have To Say? - Writing: Makes Me A Better Writer |
[Thursday
September 6th, 2007 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
bouncy |
] |
I get to feel what I write now. Everything that i see and hear makes me write differnt than i did be for. I have the ideal of what i want to say and it cames to me better, I could say that the thing that makes me write better is the way I have grown as a person but it wouldn't be the truth. it is the people around me who makes me choose what i write more. I love who I am and that is all that matters.Ihave the right to chooose what i want to say rather than just being put on the spot.
|
|
| push it to the limit |
[Wednesday
August 8th, 2007 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 drained |
] |
I am here to say that iam going to make a change in my Life. I am going to get away from all the thing that make me sick I am going to see what it like to start over and live for me not for every one else. Yes it will be hard but that is okay there is nothing i can;t handle. all the things that keep me from who ia really am will be put in a bag and thrown away. this something i need to do foe me. if i don't will be lost in a mess that i can get out of.
|
|
| what to do |
[Friday
April 20th, 2007 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 drunk |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
llyod |
] |
My life has changed in the last 6 months. I think that i may be growing up now. see i work all the time so my time to spend doing thing is cut down. I know that my friends may feel like i am never around but time seems to get awy from me. I am so busy try to keep things to gether that some times i froget about what i need in the day. i see every one in pain, but i can't seem to find awya to help. on top of things i think that i may be see things in a new light the things that bother me before seem to not any more
|
|
| I aint afraid |
[Friday
September 1st, 2006 ] |
|
i am doing okay in many words iam just doing what i need to do to make it though my life . thing some times don't come easy so i just keep trying i live for me.
|
|
| caught |
[Friday
September 1st, 2006 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
enraged |
] |
okay the one person you know you can always count on when things get hard is your mother and father. why is it that my mother takes from me. she stale $55.00 from me and than she did not say a word. than when i went to here house to say something to her about it sher made it seem like it was okay. i know that hating some one is not right but i am getting to the point when i have no other thought or feeling in my heart. i have to be real i just want her to leave me alone that is all i can say t o her at times. i want to hide from the pain in my heart but i am not giving up.
|
|
| another peom |
[Thursday
August 31st, 2006 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blah |
] |
How can I
How can I trust you when you lie to me so?
How can I enjoy my life when I am sad?
God says life comes hard when you don’t believe.
So I get on my knees each night and pray for you and me.
The odd thing is I pray more for you,
So your life does not catch up with you
And you see your evil ways. So can I live?
But how can I do that if you hurt me so?
|
|
| a peom |
[Thursday
August 31st, 2006 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 relieved |
] |
All cried out...
You walked out the door with out telling why.
The burses that you leave on my face and body
Is not as bad as the ones on my heart and soul.
When my friends ask why I am still with you,
Like a fool I say you still love me.
When I start to cry you make it seem like it
Is my fault you hurt me. Now as I sit here
In the hospital waiting to find out what bones
I broke; I start to cry and realized that i am all cried out.
|
|
| things just never go right |
[Thursday
August 31st, 2006 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 groggy |
] |
i went to the college yeasterday to pick my classes but i ended up finding out that i can't go back to school. I have to find other way to pay for it. i guess i need to take a minute and let thing fold out so i can see what i need to do. i am mad but i will be okay. I am willing to take my time and let thngs come to me the way it should.
|
|
| ice princess |
[Thursday
August 24th, 2006 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 ditzy |
] |
Why am I the one who gets called the names that don't fit who I am. Yes at times I can be a Bitch but that is just me.I feel lost when I am not In control Of things and that is the only thing that keeps me sane. I am run In side but I don't let any one know that is what I am doing. I keep my self to a perfect person I am kind to every one but I hate people who think they can use their looks to get them a head in life that is not right and I don't care what you look like it is who you are that makes the person and that is how i see it. So if you call that a ice priness than brr. if the weather says i am that than that is what i am and i am happy.
|
|
| i am me |
[Wednesday
August 23rd, 2006 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
weird |
] |
All my life I have been treated like I have some thing wrong with me. I got used by the guys that wanted to date some one i was close to. even when I was around family i was the one left out of the joke. i was never the one people like to be around. i was to fat or to ugly has people say but i have figured it out. i really don't care to much about them. i Just want to be me. Even if it means people may not talk to me ar see me as who i am. what i look like is not who i am i love to be me and that is all i a can say. the thought of changing makes me sick to my stomach. i want to be what i want to be and if others can see past that than what does it matter to me. what they have to say about me is what they want to say but the tables always change.
|
|
| how do you know the truth |
[Thursday
July 13th, 2006 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
annoyed |
] |
i always say you should let go of the things that don't seem right in your life but what if you can't seem to do it. I keep trying to make sense of all the things in my life that does not make sense at all. Like my friends sometimes i feel like they don't really want to be my friends they just don;t want to hurt me. i hate that they could lie to me like that but who knows what people can do. i feel like i am running in circles and i can't seem to find my way out.
|
|
| this is my heart |
[Saturday
June 24th, 2006 ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 thirsty |
] |
The day begins and ends the same way everyday. The only thing that changes is the fact that we meet and say different things. So when can you beleive the people around you. See for weeks I have been thinking about things that sometimes seem to never make since. I sit and wonder what can I do to stop people from thinking I am stupid and can't Really see that I have no time to deal with those who want to hurt me. I seem to always find friends who never seem to see that i can be hurt and say they need this or that but can't seem to answer and thing that should be answered. Than they want to know why they can't seem to do any thing right. I run from the thing that see to scare me but at least I know what I am doing. There are times when I just feel traped in a life that makes no since but there are things that make it easier to breathe. Than I remember that i am still stuck on a guy who does not care about me anymore. I try to forget about him but some reason I can't. Every time i say i am not going to think about him some one bring him up. I think it is because he was always on my side and i could to him about anything. Even if I was scared he would just make me feel like there was nothing i could not do. So many times I have said I was going to just let my past go but the thought of what could of been seem to keep coming back. that is whay my heart seem to cry...
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